Maybe a way for USA to go?

solo

South African beer is
also acceptable, as they are pound for pound the greatest sporting
nation on earth and it can only be due to
the beer

Stinkie

Seems like a reasonable enough proposition. (I must protest against the part about the fries, though. As we all know, the British suck at producing decent fries just about as much as the Americans do. Vinegar ... Ogres.)

Jackson

Mike, you are a brave man posting this!

tinanne

Hilarious, Mike. Great humour

bellwells

Mike, this is hilarious. I've seen this before.

EDIT: Except these paragraphs:

You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns,
lawyers, or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers
and therapists shows that you're not quite ready to be independent.
Guns should only be used for shooting grouse. If you can't sort
things out without suing someone or speaking to a therapist, then
you're not ready to shoot grouse.

Therefore, you will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything
more dangerous than a vegetable peeler. Although a permit will be
required if you wish to carry a vegetable peeler in public.

Gaieus

One (actually Canadian - which is also a Commonwealth nation) addendum to # 9:

@unknownuser said:

American beer is like making love in a canoe...
f***ing close to water.

Alan Fraser

@unknownuser said:

. . .I'll stick with the FREEDOM FRIES!!!

David, that's most ungracious of you towards those nice French people. You'd still be spelling things properly if it wasn't for them.

Stinkie

@alan fraser said:

French

waves Belgian flag, while singing the Brabançonne

I'm sorry for the off topicness, but this is a matter of national pride.

sorgesu

What a hoot Mike. Love it.
I guess it doesn't really matter that Independence wasn't "conferred" it was snatched without permission

Gaieus

Well, at least the Brits could keep Canada at that time

sorgesu

Our kind of "kept" works really well.

tim

@alan fraser said:

@unknownuser said:

. . .I'll stick with the FREEDOM FRIES!!!

David, that's most ungracious of you towards those nice French people. You'd still be spelling things properly if it wasn't for them.

Not to mention that the whole 'freedom fires' nonsense was a joke in and of itself - they were named for the chef, not the country. Yet another dimwit congress-critter giving us all a laugh.

david_h

@tim said:

@alan fraser said:

@unknownuser said:

. . .I'll stick with the FREEDOM FRIES!!!

David, that's most ungracious of you towards those nice French people. You'd still be spelling things properly if it wasn't for them.

Not to mention that the whole 'freedom fires' nonsense was a joke in and of itself - they were named for the chef, not the country. Yet another dimwit congress-critter giving us all a laugh.

Hence my joke reference. The Whole Freedom Fries issue was probably the stupidest thing our Congress has concerned itself with since _____________ (insert your own gag here. . .the list is endless)

I actually preferred Liberty McNuggets made from real Bald Eagles!

david_h

We are most amused. . . .

Does that mean Her Most Regal Majesty, who just happens to be one of the richest women in the world, will pay off our debt and put us all on an allowance??

I have no opinion on the pints/lagers/bitters/beers but the thing about the crisps. . .uh-uh. . .I'll stick with the FREEDOM FRIES!!!

Jackson

@unknownuser said:

Liberty McNuggets

Alan Fraser

I can just see Stinkie jumping up and down at this point shouting "They're Belgian Fries, dammit."

Stinkie

You better not make fun of me, Fraser! My FF subscription just expired, and I haven't decided yet whether I'll get a new one or not!

Alan Fraser

Aw! go on. I'll make you a nice little model of Karl Marx holding a cone of frites.

remus

pmiller

Okay by me, except that Andie Macdowell was playing an american in 4 weddings....